Monday, October 03, 2005

Random rules of the Iten

Whoever is driving has control of the radio. They get to listen to whatever they want and the passenger can’t change the channel. The passenger can ask to change it, or the driver can offer control. Never assume you as the passenger can change it. You need to have verbal confirmation to change it. i.e. When I’m playing air keyboard during Kansas’ “Point of No Return” don’t reach over and change the station because you find the song cheesy. I’m playing air keyboard here!

Never shake hands with someone who just came from the bathroom.

Use two towels after bathing. One is used for the top half and a second for the bottom. Also, when friends visit put away the bottom half towel.

Unless it’s an emergency never leave a baseball game early.

Never assume the Cubs will win.

Never take a man who wears a seashell necklace seriously

Ditto a man who wears a baseball cap backwards

No matter how well it’s going never kiss a girl on a first date.

Never do more than one shot of tequila

Wait at least half an hour after playing a racing video game before getting behind the wheel of a real car.

Just because you haven’t heard of it doesn’t mean it sucks.

Never buy a comeback album

Only buy fitted baseball hats

Except in absolute emergencies never take a dump at a stranger's house or in a public restroom.

Shorts and sandals are only for the beach or the privacy of your own home. Also, sandals should never be worn in a public bathroom.

Always disinfect your phone after someone uses it

Never touch another person’s laundry

Never ever touch the hat

5 comments:

faith said...

Your etiquette is not as OCD as some I know, I am impressed. The only time I leave a baseball game early is when I'm with people who don't drink and I haven't had a beer in 5 innings...

- I'm especially impressed with your towel rule, most guys I know use the same towel for a month...I throw them in the laundry after each use, and have separate ones for when guests are over...never share a towel (even a 'top' towel) with anyone!

- I think my problem with men is that I have trusted the backwards cap and shell guys...I trust everyone, I'm such a sucker!

Keymaster said...

Can you touch someone's laundry if it's clean? There is nothing better than sleeping on freshly washed sheets.

I don't agree with the sandal issue but then again as a girl I do have a lot of sandal options that can dress them up.

I miss the beach. I need to plan a trip to California again very soon.

Bradford said...

Faith: This really only scratches the surface of my quirks.

Keymaster: I should've said a "stranger's" laundry. It was mainly aimed to those who feel the need to help push your laundry through the laundromat process. I don't want to come to the laundry room and find my clothes touched by a stranger

Also, you're right the sandal rule doesn't apply to ladies.

faith said...

I was confused on the laundry issue too...but I agree! I live in a house, and formerly there was a man who lived in the suite above me. He was seriously creepy!!! He used to take my laundry out of the dryer and fold it...even my 'unmentionables' it always made my skin crawl. I told him to stop, but some how he thought it would 'impress me' that he was helping with my laundry.

Brad, as long as your 'quirks' involve you being clean and not creepy, I will be impressed.

KBall said...

Seashell necklaces are like the international symbol for "I'm a tool." Though I disagree with your tequila shot stance.