Thursday, February 02, 2006

How I Knew I Wouldn’t Fit In or Why I Hate Those Math Flash Card Games in Grade School!

My first year at Bob Jones elementary started off rocky and then quickly continued downhill. It was early on in fifth grade. My teacher decided it would be great to torture everyone with a game of Math Flash Cards. She split the room into two teams. We then proceeded to stand in a firing line next to our opponent. As classmates started dropping like flies, especially when a division problem was on the card, I got closer and closer to making an ass of myself. Finally, I was my turn. I was going up against one of the smart girls with her white cardigan and pink bow. Grrr. I waited in anticipation, staring at the card in the teacher’s hand, waiting for her to turn it over. In a split second the card turned and I heard her scream “Six!” I was done. In frustration I yelled “Darn!” Every classmate turned in my direction. Their mouths and eyes wide open in wonder as if I had declared “I hate white people!” Then they all chimed into a chorus of “Awwwwwww. You said darn.” I glanced up at the steely gaze of the teacher. “Brad! Go sit in the corner.” For saying “darn?” I was being punished for saying “darn!” I debated about stating my defense with an example of “Interjection” from School House Rock. Luckily, I remembered their stance on any music with a beat, and thought better of it. Sitting in the corner on the Teflon coated chairs, I stared at the wall. At that point I realized I hated this place. In that four letter moment I was turned from the new kid trying to find his place to an outsider. I took that label and ran with it. The best thing was that I didn’t even need to make and effort to be one of the bad boys. I was simply myself and at Bob Jones that’s all it took.

1 comment:

Jaime said...

I got into some serious trouble saying "crap" and "wuss." Both times I was taken completely off guard. I blame my parents for not teaching me to hide my pagan impulses better.