Thursday, October 12, 2006

International Improver

If this writing thing doesn't work out, I think my next job will be International Improver. There is no such actual job, but that doesn't mean I can't create it. I will be the person that companies bring in to make things perfect. Let's say your company have a new car in the works that will the next hot thing. The problem is you know there is something missing, and you just can't figure out what it is. That's where I come in. Bring me in and I'll figure out that there needs to be a cover over the GPS display in your new BMW. Can't find the one thing that will make your movie a masterpiece? I can for a nominal fee. I can improve on everything any one can make from albums (The answer is usually always: cowbell), to pharmaceuticals, to your company's infrastructure. It's what I'm good at. Screw making things and coming up with original ideas. I'll be the guy that makes them better. I will be honest and say there is a chance I will completely discard your whole product. Even then you will have to trust me, because I'm right and in the long run I will be saving you a shit load of money. Pepsi should have come to me back during the "clear" days. I would've saved them millions in production costs by throwing that out immediately. There are somethings you just don't mess with. The other 99% of things out there need help though, and I'm that person that can help.

1 comment:

Jiff Divingboard said...

PEPSI CLEAR WAS WONDERFUL. I stand by that. Delicious, I always thought.

BUT... I want to hear MANY other offerings about what you'd like to improve. Hey, I'm open.