Creepy Fan-mail for 80's TV Shows (Real or Fake?)

To: TiffanyBrissette@fan.net
Subject: tiffany you are the cutest.

Hello Babydoll(vicki). how are you our sweet little robot?

I am a resident in Bombay(India)

Vicki, I am watching Small Wonder on the star tv network since 1996. Wow what a sitcom. (Now they show it on air -mon to fri 1500, 1730, and 0030hrs and sunday 0900hrs) It is so nice that i still watch it now. You performed the role of vicki the robot so well that i really fell in love with that character. You not only proved to be a versatile actress but a sweet little star of the celluloid screen. Vicki, You are really to good. I read about you in your homepage and was really overwhelmed on your achievement which you have attained through your hard work. You have given your 3-Ds in your career in a very tender age (Dedication, Devotion and Determination). you have these 3-Ds, i think, since you are born. The bottomline is that you are a born star that shine in the eyes of the small wonder fans. I am the greatest small wonder fan myself. I have a made firend ship with an imaginary friend called Vicki the robot. I really worship here with my whole heart. She lives in my imaginations as my guide in life and my tormenter in my deeds. Vicki ,you are that cute.

This is something personal. Vicki your eyes are too beautiful. And what about your smile. Its like the most beautiful thing god has ever made and that is the pure innocent smile of a child. Your looks are hypnotising and your serious look are really enchanting.
I am typing this messages with your imaginations in my memory bank and your image sweet image in the computer screen. I have always imagined you as a long lost friend but never felt you so close to my conscience. The fact is "I never miss you in my thoughts but whenever I think of you I really miss you alot."

Its true very much to my heart that I have imagined you as the same cute little obedient and loveble robot in your real life. I thank God that he had blessed me with the previlidge of seeing the most beautiful girl on earth.

I wish you all the best for your future career and would wish to see you again on t.v. in a new role.

A request to you, Vicki. Please, kindly answer my email message on my email address as given below.

I will feel really blessed and on top of the world if you would reply. I will wait for The reply message from my real imaginary heart proclaimed friend VICKI LAWSON.

Ok tiffany, God Bless You. Take Care. see yah.

L.L.L.( Live Life Long).

OH REALLY SHE'S A SMALL WONDER.

Ebay Gold!

This is the greatest thing I've ever gotten off ebay.

Joyful Noise

It's difficult categorizing music that combines B-girls rapping, cheerleaders cheering, 80's action TV themes, and kitchen sinks. Some call it toy rock. I call it fun.

The Go! Team - The Power is On - Thunder, Lightning, Strike

I've heard that there have been problems with clearing some of the samples for a US release. I was though able to find it on iTunes. I'm also still working on a permanent title for this feature, so any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

If you are an artist or artist representative being featured on this blog and want me to take down a song, let me know, and it will be removed from the server immediately.

My American Single for July

She calls herself "big blonde." Bless you American Single for knowing not what I want but what I need.

Let's Hear You Bucks Fans!

I'm sure Milwaukee Bucks fans are thrilled that the main negative about their #1 draft pick, Andrew Bogut, is he "lacks athleticism." How many Buck fans were hoping to instead hear Marvin Williams name? Probably not as many Raptor fans that burned their jerseys right after they heard the name Charlie Villanueva. Their best player, Bosh, plays the same position. This is what they do after getting zip in trading Carter? It's like watching a victim in a horror movie. After she enters the scary house, and then folows the noise up to the attic, you eventually find yourself rooting for the slasher. Are they trying to move the team out of Toronto? How else can you explain screwing up two first round draft picks like that?

Bonus Track for Your Love

I've come to the realization that I want to post more than one lame song a week. This leaves the short lived title "Song of the Week" obsolete. Which isn't really a bad thing. I hate coming up with titles, so I am asking for your help. I offer this song of musical comedy gooooold in exchange for a title suggestion or two. Thank you.

Freelove Freeway - David Brent

Whew!

That blustery wind blowing out of the Midwest was actually the collective exhale of the Cub faithful after the way Prior pitched yesterday after coming off the DL. With the Cubs taking two of three from the White Sox, and Kerry Wood coming back Wednesday, the hopes and expectations for the Cubs are going to rise. I hope they can meet them, and take the Wild Card.

Save Your Spot Now for the Next Trial of the Century!

With the Oprah, microphone squirt gun, and Matt Lauer incident isn’t it obvious Tom Cruise will be involved in the next big celebrity trial. All the warning signs are there. He’s confusing celebrity power with real power. His self censoring chip is nearly worn away. And I’m pretty sure he’s under the assumption that the world loves him. So, when there is a news report implicating Tom Cruise of a mass suicide involving people wearing tighty whities and Ray-bans with “need for speed” tattooed on their forehead, don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Song Of The Week 6/26-7/1/205

A few years ago my coworkers and I would offer up old favorites or new discoveries for each others enjoyment. Unfortunately, once our office moved and coworkers advanced this lit bit of goodness went by the roadside. So, I decided to resurrect it here.

Every Sunday I will offer a song for your enjoyment. My hope is to either introduce you to something new or remind you of past joy. So we begin…

The Records - Starry Eyes - D.I.Y.: Starry Eyes: UK Pop, Vol. 2
This was the original SOTW at work, so it only seems right that this is the first one I offer. A Power Pop gem of catchy goodness. This song is apparently not about a woman, but the bands manager whom they fired.

Also, I believe this should work both ways. If there's a song or band that you would like to recommend for SOTW then please do so through email. I make no promises that it will make it, but I will gladly take a listen.

If you are an artist or artist representative being featured on this blog and want me to take down a song, let me know, and it will be removed from the server immediately.

Another Uptown Lights Review

Here's another Uptown Lights review. This one's from Rhino.com.

My American Single for June

American Single
Originally uploaded by Wabasawki.

kwando
Single Woman seeking Man
Age: 36 years old
from Long Beach, California, USA

I wish I knew how this happened, but it is a pleasant gift from the goodness fairies. Once a month I recieve an email from American Singles suggesting six ladies who may be right up my alley. Of course they are consistently and humorously wrong. This months selections were kind of lame. They will get better though I promise.

OW!

Baseball (Real)

The Cubs have had an uncanny amount of injuries. Todd Walker had a sprained MCL. Garciaparra tore (as in off the bone tore) his groin muscle running to first base. Kerry Wood has had arm problems that keep the team doctors baffled. And to cap it all off, Mark Prior had a ball ricochet off his elbow resulting in a fracture. Even with all these injuries the Cubs are above .500. The Cardinals have run away with the division, but the wild card is still in reach. So perhaps when a few guys come back healthy and a trade or two is made the Cubs may make it to the playoffs yet. If they do, there is one reason why: the MVP playing of Derek Lee. It won’t happen but he has a shot at winning the Triple Crown. He is either leading or a close second in the required categories of RBI, HR, and AVG. Carl Yastrzemski was the last player to achieve the Triple Crown for the BoSox in 1967. The problem is that with all of today’s specialty roles in baseball the Triple Crown isn’t likely. But we can dream can’t we?

Baseball (Make Believe)

To confirm my belief that I am the curse my fantasy team is going through the same struggles as the Cubs. I have six players on the DL. Six! Three of the injured are Hampton, Hudson, and Wood my top three pitchers. It’s gotten so bad that the day one of my pitchers came off the DL he pitched a few innings and then went back on the DL. At the beginning of the season I wrote “Things I need to happen for this year to be successful are Dubois to prove to Dusty he deserves to play fulltime, Wood stays healthy, Berkman comes back lighting it up, and Hampton pitches like the second half rather than the first half of last season.” Yeah. None of that happened. Morris though has worked out pretty well and I love the Father Murphy look. Of course this means he’ll be on the DL next week. I’m currently in fifth place and the injuries seem to have cemented me there. It’s sad when seeing your team in fourth place excites you.

Baseball (Real and Make Believe)

I have no idea if this is cool or a sign of things to come. Right now I’m leaning towards cool. Wait...no...yes. Thanks to Carp for this one.

Bastards!

My memory seems to be slipping even more as I get older. I have no other reason for not suggesting the Heartless Bastards yesterday. They are even from my home state Ohio which is rich in musical talent. The Heartless Bastards fit into that garage rock soul that apparently seeps up from the ground. The band is great, but Erika Wennerstrom’s voice is where it’s at. The lady can howl as in Robert Plant howl with the best of them. I also love saying “Bastards.”

For a lost gem of an album I recommend The Outfield's Play Deep. You may remember the Top Ten hit "Your Love." You should remember the whole album. It's great 80's Brit-pop.

Here is a decent review in Now Playing of the last two Uptown Lights concerts.

Concert Bill

Uptown Again

Up there in my top ten reasons I’m happy to live in LA is that Greg Dulli lives here too. The benefit is the Uptown Lights. I got to see them again last month and even persuaded a co-worker to experience the gospel of Dulli. The highlight of the show was Dulli going into full on soul man mode during his rendition of O.V. Wright’s “Ace of Spades.” It was also a bonus hearing two tracks from the upcoming Twilight Singers album Amber Headlights. Dulli said this was the last Uptown Lights show which leaves me a little torn. The music fan in me believes he should tour the country with the Uptown Lights so that all may enjoy. The music snob in me gets a little thrill that I got to see the two shows Uptown Lights ever did even though I may be the only one to care. Below is the set list with the original artist.

From the Uptown Lights page at Myspace -

Punish Me - Margie Joseph
Ain’t Nobody - Chaka Khan
All Along The Watchtower - a la Jimi Hendrix
Get Ready - Temptations
Follow Me - Cee-lo
Tell Everyone - Ronnie Lane
Ace Of Spades - OV Wright
I Want To Be Free - Joe Tex
Hercules - Aaron Neville
So Tight - Amber Headlights
Tell Me What’s On Your Mind - Cyril Neville
Red Hot Mama - Funkadelic
Come To Mama - Ann Peebles
Wang Dang Doodle - a la Willie Dixon
Back Stabbers - O'Jays
I’ll Be Around - Spinners
Lost In The Supermarket - The Clash/Stand By Me - Ben E. King
Cigarettes - Amber Headlights
Ooh La La - Faces

For updates on Twilight Singers and Uptown Lights I suggest the following links.
Dulli's Inferno
Summer's Kiss

I've come to the final conclusion that I must be getting old because new music just isn't doing it for me anymore. I find myself buying fewer and fewer new albums. I always thought I'd be one of those guys who would be able to adjust. There have been a couple purchases though that I offer up to you.

The first is a hesitant recommendation simply because the singer's voice is an acquired taste. The Hold Steady are the rock band I need at the moment. Yes the singing is more talking in tune rather than actual singing, but the bar band rock and spectacular story telling makes Separation Sunday my record of the year so far.

My second suggestion will take a little effort to find becuase it's an import. Katamari Damacy is the soundtrack from the PS2 game of the same name. If you aren't familiar with the game, shame on you because you are missing out on a simple trippy joy that needs to be experienced. That same simple trippy joy is found in the music as well. I would describe it as Japanese pop, but then it's more than that. You could go find it for sale on some website, but I recommend using bittorrent to get a hold of it, and then buying it if the guilt gets to you.

Finally I recommend the power pop compilation Yellow Pills: Prefill. Jordan Oakes, who is responsible for power pop magazine Yellow Pills in the early 90's, is rightfully the man to compile this two disc set of lost power pop gems. Fans of Jellyfish, The Exploding Hearts, and dangerously catchy hooks will be fans of this set. My only complaint is the doubling up of artists on the compilation, but it's a minor complaint. I do offer this warning some of these songs are dangerously catchy.

Thanks for reading. Tomorrow will be a baseball post. So how ever that effects your reading take notice.

This "For Your Consideration" Emmy ad has been posted all over our office. Also, if she wins. I quit.

Hey! I Have a Blog!

I apologize for the long absence. If I could give a great excuse I would, but I can’t, so I won’t. For further and more consistent reading check 3rd Chair Trombone.com over in the links section. They are friends of mine and I can promise a regular dose of insightful comedy and absurdity. I will be posting a few tidbits over there when my quality can match theirs. Till then we will be playing a little catch up. For more Rosie O'Donnell goodness, TVgasm put together some choice clips from "Riding the Bus with My Sister."