There are three contestants left, and they will be singing three songs each. The three judges will then give their critique after each song. Also tonight three different people will be picking the songs the contestants will sing. That will be one of the judges, the producers, and then the contestant themselves will pick a song. Got all that?
Tonight kind of makes null the whole hullabaloo about Teen Beat's father basically being banished from any backstage access. Apparently, despite the producers saying "no," Teen Beat's pop from hell had little David add a line from a different song to his performance of "Stand By Me." This extra line from a different song cost American Idol a crap load money in order to get the rights. It has been often reported that nobody likes Teen Beat's father who was known to pick David's song, and basically be the Ike to David's Tina. So, he only has to pick one of the songs himself tonight. How many shots do we get tonight of Teen Beat's stage father tonight in the audience? On with the show.
Mary Lou Henner is in the audience tonight. And Ari's assistant from that HBO show that I can't remember the title.
Oh the contestants all went to their home towns this week too. We begin with the judges pick that is told to Teen Beat by a mayor with a bad ass handlebar mustache. His first song will be "And So It Goes" by Billy Joel. Simon humorously asked Paula what she was thinking when picking this song. I keep telling myself "Just one more week" and I never have to deal with hearing Teen Beat and his schmaltzy tendencies. Ugh. Shot of father count: 1. Randy loved it. Paula of course loved it. Simon thought it was good, but predictable. Um. Isn't everyone's performance at this point predictable?
At this point I'd like to mention I started guitar lessons today. I can kind of play the first riff of AC/DC's "Back in Black." Yeah! One more step toward the rock!
Back from the break and we have Syesha in a limo getting her song by text. Mayor of Tampa too busy? Maybe this is to show Syesha's acting talent? I thought she did that last week with her waterworks? Randy picked her song of "If I Ain't Got You" by Alicia Keys. Maybe she's not even in Tampa. Kind of like CSI: Miami isn't really shot in Miami. At this point I would like to apologize for originally giving Syesha the nickname, Bitch. I'm sorry Syesha. Randy thinks she is peaking at the right time, and I agree. Simon thought she sang it well, and she did. It still won't save her. I think she even knows it. She does look fantastic once again. I never noticed she had chin dimples.
With two down that leaves Talk Box ,who during a TV interview on the what must be the local morning show, gets his song from Simon which is "The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face" by Roberta Flack. And if you don't believe any of that was completely planned out you must be a five year old. Simon said he picked it in order to do something different. I really hope that is his mother standing there all by herself. If not, creeepy. Ew. Apparently it isn't because they just showed his family. Randy liked it, but didn't like Simon's choice. I think he's just picking on Simon. Simon really liked it, and thought round one went to Talk Box. Oh, that is his mother. Whew. Really, all three did pretty well. The judges clearly know what they are doing. Next round is the contestants' choice.
Teen Beat's choice is "With You" by Chris Brown. Wha? He should have inro'd this by saying, "This is for the ladies." Eh. At least it was something current. He can't dance, and that "My Boo" line did come across as ridiculous. Randy didn't think it was great. Paula liked it. It really wasn't him, as Simon said. The ladies though loved it. This thought proves once again he can't do anything but ballads.
Syesha chose "Fever" by Peggy Lee which seems obvious doesn't it? It's theatrical. She won't do anything original with it though. Yowza. I admit this is one of the sexier songs ever written. Randy thought she performed it well. Paula was surprised she sang this song. She didn't think it showed who she was as an artist. Simon agrees. He thought it was a lame cabaret performance. She's clearly just doing what she wants. She knows she is going home tomorrow night. Right?
We are back and Talk Box decided on "Dare You To Move" Switchfoot. Can't he just rock? Why does he have to do these slow burns to big choruses? He mumbles these songs he likes. Just like the Our Lady Peace song. Randy didn't think it was his best. It did just seem like half a chorus and an intro. Simon agrees. He says there was no clear winner in this round. I agree. Next round is producer's choice.
No commercial break we just go right into Teen Beat singing "Longer" by the late Dan Fogelberg. I feel like I should thank him once again for helping me win the Celebrity Death Pool last year. Randy thought it was an interesting song choice, but liked it. Can we stop with the singing the phonebook line. Paula blah loved blah it blahed. Simon thought it was gooey. Every performance he's had this season has been gooey. That's why I feel so dirty. Simon does think he did enough to make it through to the final two. Way to go out on a limb, Simon. We've known he was final two bound since the first week.
The producers selected "Hit Me Up" by I don't know who sings it, and he didn't say. It's by someone named Gia Farrell. Randy thought it was just OK. Paula did the song well, but doesn't think it defines her. Paula doesn't think it is enough. Simon thought it was better than the second one. No defining moment for Syesha. We all know she is gone next week, Paula.
Finally! Talk Box was given "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith. How is it the judges have no trouble pciking songs for the contestants, but the producers suck at it? And during Seacrest's intro there is this dorky kid trying too hard to be funny. I would have no problem with Seacrest clocking that kid. It would be completely justified. Hey, I think that is Diane Warren in the audience. She wrote this song. Coincidence? Randy thought it was ok. I know it was predictable, but the producers picked it not him. Paula sees him advancing. Simon claims that Talk Box won the night.
There we go. By this time next week we will be down to our final two of the two Davids. Syesha will be given the boot tomorrow night. This is one of the most anti-climactic seasons in idol. I didn't didn't get to go to Anne Marie's place tonight, so I will leave Anne and Ben H. to give their worst and fav int he comments.