Look People! I'm Never Going to Coachella! Never!

From January till around now I'm asked too many times to count if I will be going to the Coachella Music Festival. To those people the answer is no and will always be no forever and ever amen. I understand that you think my love for music would make me a shoo in to be a participant at Coachella, but you are wrong.

For those who perhaps don't know, Coachella is a three day event where around 100 artists perform on various stages. The artists range everywhere from Willie Nelson to The Roots to The Arctic Monkeys. It's a lot of decent to good bands and some crappy playing a lot of music. It's also a hell of a lot of people congregating in the desert where if you didn't know it is really hot. Why would I want to pay a crap load of money to hang out with a bunch a dirty sweaty people? I don't want to deal with that just to see a short set played by two maybe three bands that I really want to see. Give me small dark club with a hundred plus fans that really want to see one band instead of thousands of people in the high desert sun with the dust and sweat and the port-a-potties. I realize there are some of you that feel the need to congregate with a bunch of people and "feel the love and power of music." Well, I'm not one of them. So, I post this as a preemptive strike to those who might ask me later. I hate fake sharing your excitement for something that I would never do. Actually, you can add any outdoor festival to this post.