American Idol Recap (The Shocking Edition)

Why is this edition so shocking? Well, Tiny Dancer was shockingly eliminated last week. The American Idol world was bewildered by his elimination. I imagine he's probably clicking his heels knowing he's probably set. There are only 7 left. What does that mean? that means the show will now fly by.

Tonight we have another mentor. It's Mariah Carey Night! Let the craziness begin.

Kicking off the show is Teen Beat with "When You Believe" from Prince of Egypt. Anne Marie has indicated she loves this song. All sorts of sap including Teen Beat wearing ridiculous pleather pants. We are up to three eye rolls already from Anne Marie. Anne Marie, Ben H. and I are bored. The judges all loved it and are bowing down at the robotic domination that is Teen Beat. Why do we see how average he is, but nobody else does. Even his emoting comes across like a Disneyland animatronic.

After the break we have The Ringer in the Coke hot seat. She talks about how shocked she was that Tiny Dancer got the boot and how funny he was. She will sing "Without You." She was smart to pick a song that Mariah Carey covered. Anne Marie the song was originally done by Badfinger. The Ringer did well, and this was the best she has looked in the whole conversation. OK Simon is just tearing her apart for no reason when she hit more notes than Teen Beat.

Syesha is up next. I've begun to feel guilty with the Bitch nickname, so I'm ditching it. She takes enough unneeded criticism from the judges. I don't need to add to it. I've actually begun to feel sorry for her. Her song choice will be "Vanishing." It seems Mariah actually helped her. Like the last two weeks she did well. Of course the judges will be harsh. Paula's going off on one of her pointless tangents. Simon liked it. But he thinks she picked an unfamiliar song which will hurt her.

Here's where crazy meets crazy in Goody Two Shoes meeting Mariah. She will be singing "Hero." She's going back to the piano thing. Man I miss Chikezie. Anne thinks Simon will love it. The bridge threw Randy but thought it was pretty good. Paula blah blah blah. Ooh she made a good point of her speeding it up. Which Goody did. She did rush after the bridge, and you could see her shaking. Simon thought the middle part was missed. Then there was a debate about meat and buns. Don't ask.

Headlights follows with "Forever." Wow this is going to be awful. Mariah you can't be serious about loving her version better. Wow this is awful. It should be pointed out that all the ladies brought out the cleavage tonight. Thankfully David Cook did not. How could Tiny Dancer be gone and not her? Really America? Randy thought she started steppin' up. Paula is blown away. Simon thought she managed well. But we all know there is no reason she should be on that stage.

Aw look it's Short Round. Talk Box will be doing "Always Be My Baby." Will he pull off another "Hello?" Mariah said it sounded haunting. I don't know if haunting does well on American Idol. So he changed it up because he had to and he did well. Randy stands up for it being the most brilliant performance this season. Simon loved it and thought it stood out. He's getting a little emotional. This has to put him close on the heels of Teen Beat. Is he my favorite? No, but he has been creatively consistent nearly each week. And he has been different enough to really stand out.

Stoner is up with "I Don't Wanna Cry." Ok, I give Mariah credit for actually mentoring the contestants. She's actually giving them worthwhile tips. Stoner's was the same performance he's given every week. It was boring. Randy didn't love it. Paula loved it of course. Simon, surprise, actually liked it. He thinks the guys have completely won tonight.

And just like that we are finished. It goes by so quickly now. Mariah was surprisingly good as a mentor. Please send Headlights home America.

Silverlake Top Three or Two
Anne Marie: David Cook, Syesha, Carly
Ben H: David Cook, Syesha
Me: Syesha, Talk Box